‘I think I have lost interest in sex’

Recently I was talking to a friend, and she told an interesting story. This story is about a friend who lost interest in sex. She described this sentence as now being an asexual person. This is where I feel uneducated. Is it like this?

We are all living in a world where gender is fluid. We love to explore and get to know people to see if there is a sexual click or an emotional connection. I didn’t know about this, but the generation after me (I am a millennial) has thought me a lot about how they see things and love some exploration. They are so open which I find completely charming.

Anyway, my friend told me about these two girls that were in a relationship. One of the girls said she wasn’t feeling herself anymore, and she decided to go into transition. She is a transgender. While in the process of changing, her partner wasn’t feeling it anymore. As supportive as she was, she couldn’t cope that she was seeing another person in front of her, and not the person she fell for at the start of their relationship.

Her words were: “I still love her because we share that emotional part with each other, but I fell for her as a woman, and now that she has changed into a man. I do not feel attracted anymore in any sexual way. But not only her, but I also do not feel sexually attracted to anyone. I think I am asexual.”

When my friend was telling me this story, it kind of got me confused. And I asked her what are her thoughts about it? She replied, I guess she loves this person but now it is different for her, and she doesn’t feel that sexual attraction towards her because of the changes but she doesn’t feel attracted to anyone else, but it feels unfair…

Unfair? I didn’t want to comment on this subject, but I wonder what your opinion and thoughts about this are. Have you ever experienced this? Or what would you do in this situation?

What I read about asexuality from WebMD is that asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction to others or low interest in sexual activity. Some people consider asexuality to be their sexual orientation, and others describe it as an absence of sexual orientation.

Asexual can also be an umbrella term that includes a wide spectrum of asexual sub-identities, such as demisexual, grey-A, queerplatonic, and many others. Asexual people may identify as cisgender, non-binary, transgender, or any other gender.

It is common for asexual people to have romantic (but not sexual) attractions to others. They may identify as hetero-, homo-, bi-, or pan-romantic. Others are aromantic — that is, they feel no romantic attraction to other people.

I do hope now both can find their happiness, the person who has changed his gender and the partner who is now asexual. It is a complicated world we live in but yet we try to be as understanding and caring for others.


Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this blog post are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official views of Phryme.


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